I'M NO HERO

Those are words I did not want to hear someone say about me connected to this IM training. When I think of a hero, its someone who saves someone from some catastrophe, or who puts their life on the line for others. Make no mistake, Ironman training is not about that. Its a totally selfish pursuit of a goal or dream. Amazing maybe. Remarkable possibly. But hero? No.

The day is getting close, the training winding down, and still there seems to be so much to do. Not only do I have the usual checklist of gear to assemble, the car to get checked out, and confirmations to be made on the place to stay, but I also have a hectic week and then some of work, with last minute deadlines and staying late to finish up, as well as Halloween festivities with the grandkids and a bridal showeron Sunday before I leave, all cutting into my reserves of energy I am trying to restore. And that doesn't even take into account getting ready for my son's wedding the Saturday after my race. I have errands to run every night after work and some lunch hours as well. I will get back into town late on Tuesday and will need to be back at work on Wed. and Thurs. and take Friday off again for the wedding on Saturday. Time is slipping away from me and it is not helping keep me distracted.

People are asking me daily about the event, making me feel pressured now about my performance and not letting anyone down, making me worry about finishing, or at least finishing within the deadlines. I know I have spent the better part of this year training, but I also feel some mistakes were made along the way, and I am hoping they don't come back to haunt me on race day. And yet, there are things I still have not done and am not likely to get done in the next less than a week before I leave.

Two nights of insomnia haven't helped either, again tapping into my reserve energy stores.

So no, I don't feel like a hero. I feel rather somewhat unprepared and nervous about not living up to my own expectations. But, ready or not, here I come.

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

JUST ANOTHER TRAINING DAY

Grand Rapids Half Marathon, Oct. 18, 2009

Sunday was version 3 of the Grand Rapids Half Marathon. It wasn't a PR, but I didn't expect it to be and would have been greatly surprised if it had been. I did, however, do exactly as I planned to do. My long training day the day before (6.5 hours) made me wonder if I even would be able to move, let alone run 13.1 miles. In fact, I had considered NOT running it, just so I could focus more on training, but then better judgment got ahold of my mind and made me realize I still would have to do the run, so why not have it course supported? Besides, I did not want to lose the $90 entry fee. And my training program for the day of the race actually was for a 3 hour run, so I knew I would be running more than 13.1.

This year, the weather was again cold at the start, but warmed up nicely, compared to other years. I really think this might have been the best weather yet. Even though it was only 30 degrees at the start, at least there was no wind or snow like we've had in past years.

My plan was to run to the start of the race from my gym (3/4 mile away) as a warmup, so I waited until 30 minutes before the start to head over there. Then I ran into a group of ladies I work with who had trained all summer for this as their first half marathon, so I chatted with them. I was not nervous in the least. To me, it was another training day, that's all. I was more anxious to get started.

Before we even started, I realized I didn't really know the course, since they changed it this year, but eventually realized it was a course made up of routes I pretty much train on all year, so all of it was familiar. The only thing I did "wrong" was totally forget to do my run/walk thing in the first 2 miles that I find works best in training, because regardless of whether this was a race or not, it was only training for me. I felt so good at the beginning that I just got caught up in the moment, and it wasn't until after the 2nd mile that I caught myself from continuing on with that madness. No matter how good I felt at the start, I knew it was not likely to last, and I also wanted to more closely simulate training rather than a race.

By the time I got to 5 miles, the half marathon winners (male & female) were heading back. At first I thought they might be relay people, but relays were marathoners, and it was too soon for that. This year, the female first and second place winners were 3rd and 5th overall. Pretty impressive.

The only spot I felt slowed me from my predicted pace was at 7 miles, where, even though I knew the course, I felt like someone had thrown a hill in there. Once I got past that and on to 8 miles, I felt a lot better, even though from 7 through 9.5 we had some hills. Nothing serious, but a lot of people were walking here, as I went motoring on past.

One guy at the turnaround who was walking totally bypassed the turnaround and cut that off. No race person was there, so I'd like to think he didn't see it, but he did see me and another woman do it, so I'm pretty sure he just ignored it. He was walking at a fast enough clip that once I decided he was not going to get ahead of me, it took almost 3 blocks to shake him! He passed me again between 11 and 12 miles while I was struggling to get a Gu packet open, but again, I stalked him until I passed him and I never saw him again.

I can't say this was easy in the sense that I just floated through the miles, but it was considerably easier than I expected it to be, and while I was almost 3 minutes slower than last year, my pacing was right on to what I planned to do, and I was able to pick it up some at the end without my usual "I think I'm going to throw up" feeling. In fact, once I got to the finish line, I saw Don was there handing out mylar blankets with another guy we know, and I gave him a hug and said no thanks, I've got to keep moving.

The post race food/party consists of chili and beer, the usual bagels, bananas, oranges, yogurt, and apples, and this year Culvers frozen custard. I grabbed a banana and a chocolate custard and a spoon and headed back to the gym at a slow trot to get the rest of my miles in, for a total of 14.6. That was enough. My feet were killing me actually, so I was glad to stop.

Next on the training agenda was a 1.5 hour swim. I stretched for a while, ate my frozen custard, got some more water, and then headed to the pool. I wasn't that hungry. I felt a little slower than usual, because my legs were a little stiff, but what really got to me were cramps in my feet! I now know why they do not have you bike, run, and swim in that order in triathlons. I'm sure lots of people would cramp up. I have never had feet cramps this bad ever, to the point where my feet looked deformed and one felt like it was paralyzed. It took me 3 or 4 minutes to get that worked out. After that, I made sure I stopped after every quarter mile to drink water and stretch my feet, even though I had intended to swim straight through. It was either that or I would never get done!

All in all, it was a pretty successful training weekend. And I got some nice bling besides!

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

WHEN IS IT REALLY ENOUGH?

The frost was on the pumpkin, literally, when we headed out on our bikes Sunday morning. It was supposed to be my last LOOONG bike ride before the big race, four weeks out.

I had been whining all last week about the predicted weekend weather, but then suddenly things started looking better with the rain forecast clearing before Sunday. The temperature, however, got considerably colder.

Friday morning I started out on my last longest run, 18 miles, around 5 am, with the intention to run 3.5-4 hours, which I did. When I started, it was about 52 degrees with a light mist. After about 45 minutes, it started really raining, and continued on for the next 3 hours of my run, as well as through the rest of the day. Because I was determined to get this done, it didn't bother me too much, until about the last hour. I had mapped out three 1.5 mile routes around my house so I could run out and back and get water at my house, which I placed in a cooler in the driveway, along with some gu. I really hate carrying water and can't carry enough anyway. The idea of running long runs and having to carry water or circle back to the car has pretty much kept me running only around 2.5-2.75 hours max, and I really felt I needed to go farther. My planned 20 mile training run 2 weeks before didn't totally happen because I had been sick the weekend before and still wasn't up to par enough to pull off the entire distance. Same with the week before last. It seemed if it wasn't the weather, it was that ear problem and head and nasal congestion I've been suffering with. It was difficult to breathe for about 2 weeks. Friday was my last ditch effort to put that plan into action. Also, as is my usual training MO, when I reach the desperation point in the training--meaning no more time to fool around--I get the job done.

For the most part, the run in the rain wasn't bad until I got to the last hour when I had to use the bathroom. Once I stepped into the house, I was totally aware how wet I was, and the only thing that would do was change all my clothes into dry stuff. It felt so much better, I couldn't believe the difference in my disposition, along with getting 10 extra pounds of wet clothes off. Everything was soaked through and dripping.

After that, I had to go to work. I was hoping for a fairly relaxed day--meaning no running up and down the steps all day, but that didn't happen. From the minute I got there, it was high speed until after 5 pm. I can't remember how many times I climbed the flight of steps from where I work to where the attorneys I work with are located, but I'm guessing at least 10 times. And then I was on my feet for probably a total of 2 more hours. By the time I left work, my legs pretty much felt like wood. But Saturday was only going to be a swim day so I could spend time doing family things, only, of course, to free up my day Sunday to spend biking.

Saturday night the thermometer dropped into the 20s, and by the time I got up Sunday morning, a hard frost had settled over the world, leaving tender plants frozen and done for the season. And we were going to bike in this stuff.

The challenge then was to dress warmly enough to not freeze to death, yet be able to maneuver gears and brakes on the bikes. I had driven around one area where we have biked on the bike path numerous times and found several "flat" roads I thought would make Don happier than the trail did, especially when he was giving his time and comfort to go out and freeze on a long bike ride with me.

I finally ended up wearing long underwear, tights, and bike shorts over that, as well as ankle guards (wrist guards I put on my ankles) to keep any exposed area warm, shoe booties, a turtleneck wickaway shirt, a long underwear shirt over that, and a bike shirt, along with my new bike jacket and 2 pair of fleece gloves. On my head I wore a bandana scarf and an ear band under my helmet. The one thing I hadn't counted on was how cold my face would be! I almost wished I had on a face mask. My fingers were so cold the first 5 miles they hurt, but after a while either they warmed up or numbness set in and I didn't notice as much. My legs were pretty warm, and my upper body felt okay. My new jacket has longer sleeves so no part of my wrist is exposed like in my other jackets and has a higher neck so no air got down the neck.

Don on the other hand only wore one pair of tights, one pair of gloves, and only a double layer on the upper body. If I'd known this, I would have advised him to dress warmer. By 15 miles he was suffering. I talked him into going farther, because there was no way I could cut it that short. Not that I wasn't uncomfortable, but as long as the sun was out, it was tolerable. Except when we rode into the wind. And of course there was wind. No ride I've done has gone without wind this year. Or hills. We got all of it: wind, hills, and extreme cold. By 25 miles, he was really suffering, but he continued on for me, up and down the hills, turning into and out of the wind. And while I had done some scouting around the day before looking for fairly flat roads, its funny just how "flat" those flat roads aren't when you're on a bike. The worst part, unfortunately, was every good, fairly flat road always ended up at a dead end on a dirt road. Every single one. Somehow I missed that the day before too. It was getting frustrating! I really wanted to avoid getting on the bike trail, but after 3 hours of dead ends, hills, and wind, we finally headed back on the trail because Don just couldn't stand it any longer. We still had another 7 miles to go before we got to the car, so it was about 3:20 when we stopped.

The plan was for Don to sit and thaw out while I did some more mileage. The problem was, once I stopped, I realized just how miserably cold I was. My fingers would hardly function, the little bit of sweating I did from all the layers was causing me to shake uncontrollably from the cold seeping in, and I was almost unable to eat anything because my jaws were so locked up from the cold. I thought if I warmed up for a little while I could go on, but the longer I sat in the car, the harder I shook, and my fingertips were all numb to the point of tingling. After 15 minutes of this, I decided I was not going to be able to go on further.

I tried, I really tried. I was disappointed and angry at myself for getting this far into the training and still feeling I needed one more ride, only to put us at risk of hypothermia in doing so.

So the question now is: When is enough really enough? If after dozens of rides of 50-100 miles (only one 100 however, and four 75+ mile rides), dozens of rides with wind and hills, dozens of runs of 12-18 miles in duration, dozens of runs in the heat, cold, rain, and dark, along with swimming nearly 100 miles this year, with longest swim of 2.25 miles and two other 2 mile swims, if that isn't enough, or doing a half IM and 3 Olympic distance tris, along with 2 stand alone half marathons, with another this weekend, then I guess I haven't done my training. If someone can tell me without hesitation that race day will be in the 30s with high wind, that the course will be steep climbs for 80 or more miles, or that it will rain the entire way (and I realize none of this is guaranteed NOT to happen), if that's the case, then I guess I haven't done enough training. If on the other hand what I have done, along with my determination, will at least get me to the finish line in November, then I'm hoping its enough.

(ANOTHER) WINDY WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

Just so you don't think this is my house, I have to break the silence of "Wordless Wednesday." 50 mph gusts last night. Lots of branches down around my house, leaves blowing and swirling all over, and not yet ready to fall from the trees.


It was a little less windy this morning, but it was a brisk, more than breezy run. We're definitely going to see some big changes in our weather this week and through the weekend, making IM training that much more challenging.


I am facing a dilemma for my last longest bike ride. The plan was to ride an organized ride scheduled for this weekend, but truthfully I am getting totally worn out by these windy, hilly, cold rides.


Last Sunday, Don and I started out with good intentions of doing 50+, but the farther we headed west, the darker the sky got, to the point where it was nothing but steel gray. And of course we got rained on, making things that much more fun, in addition to my bike computer always conking out from the slightest hint of moisture. (Reading reviews on line, I see now that this particular bike computer model is very sensitive to moisture, which is why it went out on my at Muncie, and continues to stop working every time the humidity is high or even a few drops of rain fall--and this is a replacement!)


Both of us were still feeling the effects of last week's windy hilly ride, and he was feeling particularly low in energy, having dropped back behind me of all things. You know if I'm ahead of you that you're in trouble.


So we took a little detour to get away from the hills for a while and to see this since we were in the area.

Apparently, the people moved out of the house the day before, disconnecting the gas appliances but failing to have the gas shut off. A Darwin Awards moment, for sure, with the house exploding. Fortunately no one was home and no one was home next door, which you can see the debris managed to blow over into their yard. The house was completely flattened.

Shortly after this, we hit a patch of showers and that pretty much finished Don off. He knows I won't ride out there by myself and didn't want to disappoint me, but he just could not continue on the hilly route we had set out on. This route is not easy on any part of it, so I really couldn't blame him for giving in for the day. I was feeling it too, especially after my long run and swim the day before. But I still had to get a ride in.

So, what to do, what to do? He suggested I go to the gym and do two hours on the spin bike. Much as I haven't been ready to move to inside workouts, I had to agree this was probably best for the day, not knowing how much more, if any, rain we were likely to get. Saturday had been an off again on again cold rain, and I wasn't looking forward to another day like that.

I was the only one at the gym when I got there. All the lights were off in fact. I quickly changed into dry inside clothes, set up the spin bike, popped in my favorite DVD ride (Ride Las Vegas) and started pedalling. I had planned to use one other DVD, but I like this one so much, once it was finished I started it up again. And then I did it again. I love the scenery, Valley of Fire State Park in Las Vegas, Nevada. Here's just a sample of the scenery.

This particular DVD also has great spinning music and NO TALKING! Something I can't stand when biking is chit chat or listening to a spin instructor yelling out instructions. So it just me, pedalling along, great scenery, and great music. It gave me a thrill watching the riders pedalling up steep climbs and then the fast downhills. I am totally envious of the smooth quality of those roads. I have put this place on my list of places to visit.

That gets me back to this weekend's dilemma. I have already decided not to do the group ride Saturday. Its supposed to once again be rainy, and this particular course is so hilly my mind just is not letting me consider doing this any more. I' m not so sure anymore that which does not kill me makes me stronger. Well, maybe stronger, just not faster. I have to come up with an alternative, however, and have considered two options:

1. Riding on the bike trail, doing two loops, total mileage of about 98-99 miles. This option, if it rains, still puts me out there all day in the wet and rain, and part of this course tends to be very windy also.

2. Doing an inside ride, at pace, for 6-7 hours. I know this is mind blowing to some people, but I have done 4 hours once and am willing to do it again if this will get me where I need to go.

Part of my discouragement on some of the longest rides is that with the wind and hills, I am not able to maintain a decent pace for the whole ride, the kind of pace I need to maintain in the race. I have done some speed rides to maintain pace, so I know I can do a certain pace, but I need to see this for a longer period of time. I need to see the numbers to give me the confidence that on race day I will also be able to do this.

I know conditions on race day are never guaranteed, but having studied the course, read the athlete forums from last year, and factoring in the potential head wind coming to the finish, I still don't anticipate it will be as bad as what I have ridden so far.

So, anyone still reading, what do you think? I have already been given a couple of different opinions, but am curious what others think?

WORDLESS WINDY WEDNESDAY

APPLE CIDER CENTURY RIDE

This was my first century ride (100 miles). Finally! After struggling with this all summer, it finally happened. Just to keep this somewhat short, I'll first highlight the good parts about this race.

One good thing was the beauty of the course: through the orchards and vineyards of southwest Michigan, into Indiana. The race organization also was great: over 5000 riders and we got a breakfast and a lunch after the ride, as well as a lot of organizing of the 15, 37, 50, 62, 75, 80, and 100 mile rides. And minimal traffic.

The bad things? The difficulty of the course, the horrible roads, the horrendous hills, and the wind, which I realize can't be controlled, but all added together makes a first century ride one for the books. The only way to describe the difficulty of the course is to say that by 62 miles I was in the granny gear and never got out of it. My knees are still aching from those hills!

The first 26 miles were comfortably deceiving: rolling to flat, through the vineyards, where the fragrance of the Concord grapes was like riding through a tunnel of grape crush, or maybe Welch's grape juice. Mmm. But then? The honeymoon was over.

From 26 until 100 miles, the hills were unrelenting, the wind was a factor, whether riding north or west, and the roads were a lot to be desired. There were so many spots where the road was so rough, I actually lost my grip on my handlebars, and there was no way to use the aero bars, as much as I wanted to. My elbows and forearms were so sore from the tension from hanging on for dear life sometimes. If the traffic had been any worse, I would have cut this thing short, no doubt.

Part of the course was into northern Indiana, and by the last 8 miles I was STILL seeing Indiana signs. I was having fits: if we only have 8 miles to go, why are we still in Indiana???? If we don't get back into Michigan soon, I am going to have a breakdown.

But the downside of getting back into Michigan was the bad roads. BAD ROADS! At 80 miles they actually had us go on an UNPAVED road! How is it posssible with all these roads out here to take us through an unpaved one??? Its not like it was having road work. It just wasn't paved, probaby never would be. What is up with that?? I walked through there, about 1/4 mile. I was very disgusted with that. Up until then, I was willing to forgive them for the bad roads and the hard course, but this put me over the edge.

After the 80 mile sag stop, I was having extreme difficulty, both mentally and physically. The hills and wind were a major factor here, and I was seriously doubting myself to be able to do this, to be able to do an IM. I prayed, a lot, to please get me through these rough spots, to help me finish, to help me see some good in this whole thing. From 85 to 100, I pushed myself through the hills, which were far worse from 88 until 100 than the first 87 miles. But I got through it, thank God, and I feel okay, other than being tired.

Somehow, this HAS to get easier!

OKTOBERFEST HALF MARATHON

September 19, 2009

While it is far from October, and while the weather here has been anything but Octoberish lately, this was the name of the race. I've never run it before. I may never do it again. Why do I continually find the hardest races in the area to do??

People told me it was hilly. Okay, I've been training on hills. Just to prepare for this and get stronger. I didn't believe them at first. The first 4 miles were gently rollling hills. However, that was the end of easy. From 4 until 11 miles, it was one hill after another, with miles 7-8 the absolute worst: 4 hills. I kept thinking I missed the mile marker for 8 but no, I just hadn't gotten there yet.

Backing up to the start of the race, it was really chilly and windy--probably about 45 degrees. And being near the lakeshore the wind was cutting right through you. The marathon started at 8 am; the half at 8:15. Good thing, because with all this long training, I pretty much take for granted running races, meaning to me its just another training day. Meaning I barely made it to the race before the start. I don't know what I was thinking, leaving the house at 7:10 for an 8:15 race that was 35 miles away, but hey, I made it. No big deal. And luckily I found a parking spot immediately and only about 1/2 mile from packet pickup.

The half marathon started on a bridge overpass, meaning uphill. I wasn't sure if it was a chip start so decided I would not start at the bottom of the hill and walked myself up more than half way to not have to deal with a long hill at the start. It was a chip start, but I was still glad to not start at the back of the pack--I knew I would be there soon enough.

Probably 95% of this race was run on a paved trail, a paved HILLY trail. Not only was it hilly, but the cantor of the trail really made my ankles and feet start hurting by the half way point, almost like someone had stomped on my insteps, so it was painful.

I had been somewhat sick all week, so didn't know what I would do with this race--go strictly for time or try to get a PR. As it turned out, with the cold day, the head congestion, and the almost constantly dripping nose, it seemed a better idea to go for time and practice my run/walk method I would hopefully do at later races.

I decided to go with what I've been doing lately on long runs: 8:2. I know I absolutely will not be able to do better than this at IM, so am practicing on every run longer than an hour. This worked for most of the race.

At around 5 miles, I spotted a woman ahead I was sure had been behind me at mile 1, but couldn't quite figure out how she could have possibly cut the course. But I was determined to pass her then, if she had somehow cut the course.

From 5-10 miles, we played cat and mouse. At 8 miles I came close enough behind her that I knew she probably was in my age group, making me that much more determined to pass her for good.

But the hills continued, and I was getting very frustrated with all the ups and downs. Would it never end??

Nine miles ended on a downhill; 10 miles started on an uphill. I passed the 3rd place woman around 10 miles. She was doing a 2 minute run and a 3 minute walk. I should pass her. I had no excuse.

Soon after, I saw Don on his bike. He had ridden out to the race start from GR. So now I had no alternative--no walking. He wouldn't allow it. I wasn't sure if I appreciated him being there or dreaded it. By 11 miles we turned into a park, but still on the paved path, and my stomach was hurting so much I had to wonder what I could do the rest of the race. I decided to keep running and slow down if necessary to just keep going and keep ahead of 3rd place woman (I had no idea at any point in the race where others were in my AG but I suspected she might be in mine). I had to walk a few more times but kept the time minimal to keep ahead of 3rd place woman. Her husband was biking along with her, helping her with water and gels, something that would not be allowed in a triathlon, so again, I was more determined to keep ahead of her.

At about 12 miles, the first place marathoner came flying by. I was surprised that it hadn't happened earlier, but like I said, this was a hilly course, and I am more than thankful not to have had to do this thing twice.

My stomach was really hurting, like someone had kicked me in the stomach, by now. It was hard to the touch, so I knew I was in distress. There were also a few more hills thrown in there, and while I tried to keep running, I had to stop occasionally to let the cramping ease up.

The last quarter mile, however, I pushed it as much as was possible, and finished in 2:42. Good enough for 2nd place in the AG. I was happy with that.

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

I PAID FOR THIS??

Yesterday was another huge leap of faith for me, getting out on the roads to ride. I signed up for the Maple Leaf ride, an organized ride put on by our local cycling club. They do 3 or 4 of these a year, and since yesterday's distance included 3 loops totalling 86 miles, I thought it would be good for me to do this,

I went alone, which was my first mistake. I knew no one there and as a result didn't have anyone planned to ride with. The second mistake was assuming that since the weather was to be near 80 degrees that day, it would be safe to wear shorts and a short sleeved shirt to start out with, in addition to using arm warmers. The meet up place was about 35 miles northwest of where I live, so as I drove north I could see the temperature in my car dropping from 60 degrees down to 51. Yikes! I was even a little shivery in the car, and didn't feel particularly great, so decided to stop at the Meijer (sort of like Walmart) right on the way and ended up buying women's silk long underwear to put under my shirt and shorts. No bulk but just warmth.

That was actually the right decision, because the entire ride was totally rural, out in the orchards, farms, and wooded areas. I was never too warm the entire time. I signed up, got my 3 maps for the 3 loops, and headed out around 8:15. I didn't want to be out there all day so wanted to get an early start. I did leave just after another person in a bright yellow coat, but never was able to catch up with that person. I just followed that yellow coat for quite a while, like a beacon in the night.

The first couple miles of the first loop were fairly flat, but my third mistake was not knowing just how hilly this course would be. Those first few miles also were along the shoulder of a highway, so I was a little paranoid right from the start, riding alone. Once we turned off the highway, it was country roads with no shoulder and no posted speed limit. That meant pickup trucks and cars pulling campers and boats flying by at who knows how fast. I was getting freaked out. And to make matters worse, by the time I got about 5 miles into the ride, I realized I had forgot to bring my ID, making me worry if I got killed no one would be able to identify me for a while. Unless maybe of course my car was the last left in the lot. Dumb, dumb, dumb!

I was pretty much angry at myself and the ride organizers for picking this route, country roads with no shoulder and at least 55 mph speed limits. If they had done this on Sunday, there would be only 1/3 or less traffic, I was sure. Saturdays are busy days; people have things to do and everyone is always in a hurry. Add to that the fact that we have had the best weather this past week we have had all year, and people are still going to the lake, which explained the number of campers and boats. And I didn't totally know the area, so couldn't take any shortcuts that I knew would be any better. I was also afraid if I got off the route and got hit or killed, no one would know. So I stayed the course.

After about 13 miles, I had to cross another major highway,and by now it was getting extremely foggy, to the point where cars with lights on were just pinpoints. It took me 3-4 minutes to cross the highway, without the benefit of a traffic light. Scary. And we would have to cross it again later.

After a few more miles, a group finally came past me, and fortunately I was able to stay close enough to them to know where to go without worrying about markings on the road or feeling like I was out there totally alone.

I thought last week's ride was hilly, but this had it beat by 100%. The only flat stretches were the first couple of miles and the last couple of miles. The rest, all hills. Hills that required me to stand a few times to keep moving without toppling over. A month ago, I could not have been able to do this route, so I at least can see some progress.

The last 15 or so miles, I rode with another guy who pretty much watched out for me, always tucking behind me when cars came, We stopped for about 15 minutes to help someone with a flat tire, and during that time I decided I was not going to do the other 2 loops. I was starving, shakey, and my head was starting to hurt a lot. I figured that was from the stress and terror of that ride, but actually I was coming down with something. I only ended up doing 34 miles then.

So today, I'm nursing a sore throat, congested head, sore ears, and athlete tracking those at Ironman Wisconsin that I know. It seems like a horrible waste of such a beautiful day, but I also know that I need to nip this thing in the bud early so I have no lingering issues getting in the way of the rest of my weeks of training. I guess I do need a day off from time to time.

CLOSET RUNNERS

That's what I call runners who don't tell me (a runner for over 20 years) that they run. No, they just slink around and say nothing. Its a little irritating at times, since how long have I been looking for running partners, and right under my nose practically there are at least a half dozen women I work with who have started running within the past 2 years? I suddenly find out when Jan says she is mentoring a group to do a half marathon in October. I'm not jealous of this, don't get me wrong. And of course right now I do not have time in my schedule to follow theirs, so while they all make Wednesday evenings a girl's night for running, I continue running alone.

All the women are younger than I am, and of course are doing nothing else but running, so we are fairly evenly matched with pace, considering I always have biking or swimming to do as well. Today again I overheard a woman who is running with this group that she only started running 2 years ago. I've also found out that one of the women is pretty fast and runs 5ks regularly. Who knew??

Despite this, I am really happy that FINALLY we are getting some women runners here in the office again. When I first started running years ago, we had several. We even had a women's team that competed in road races (cross country scoring) and won several events. But one by one, they either left to work elsewhere, stay home and have babies, or completely stopped running. Its been a long lonely stretch by myself so once I am done with the IM training, I look forward to joining this group for some running!

And it has been a lot of fun watching their excitement as they make progress on their mileage goals. They are learning that the body will do what the mind lets it do.

OUT OF MY COMFORT ZONE

You've heard the phrase "white knuckle flyer"? Well today, I was a white knuckle biker. Today was a big step for me, riding on the actual road, rather than a bike trail. This weekend, the Sunday before Labor Day, in 2006, I was hit by a car while on a training ride.

I pretty much realized when the actual anniversary date arrived (9/3/06) and I couldn't remember the actual date, that I was finally able to put that behind me.

I had vowed after my accident to NEVER ride on the road again. While I did a few times in the year following the accident, I was so paranoid, I was a complete wreck. It totally held me back, and I was not able to go on any more rides because of total fear. The few races I did that following year did not go well because of this fear. Yet, there was nothing I could do about it. It was still too fresh. Not that I remembered the pain of the hit--I just remember to this day the explosion in my head when I was hit--I still remembered clearly the weeks and then months of pain and recovery. It was serious. And, while I don't consider myself a superhero, I have to wonder how many people would have recovered and fought back from serious injuries at my age.

Yet, despite this, I was determined to get back my triathlon life. I tried very hard for the next 2 years, with limited success. Then, earlier this year, I decided I was ready to try an Ironman, yet didn't know until recently that my fear was restricting me, holding me back. I knew I had to let it go but was afraid to try. And I didn't want to put my family through this all again.

I was having extreme difficulty and frustration meeting my biking goals, and I knew it was because of being unable to take to the open road and get off the bike trail. Training for Muncie, I barely squeaked by on my biking goals, and after another month, I could see that squeaking by was not going to cut in for Ironman. Not only was the out and back and out and back again on the bike path so incredibly boring I wanted to scream, I could see I was making little to no real progress on my pacing or mileage goals.

So, today, for the first time in many years for me, Don and I set out for a route that he loved and trained on for years, to Spring Lake and back. I have to admit, it was not without some anxiety and apprehension, but I knew I had to do this. This is an incredibly hilly route, and it is not without its share of traffic, yet I did not resist or complain. For one thing, I could see how happy he was to be out on the road again, mentoring me through the biking miles. I could tell when we rode on the trails that while he did it, he was pretty bored too. And he, of course, knew better, having done several Ironmans himself, that I was not going to make it if I didn't get over my fear and get out on the road.

This ride was pretty hard for me, 74 miles of hills, hills, and more hills. Fortunately, most of the roads had been recently resurfaced, making the miles fly by fairly effortlessly, despite the hills. By the end, while I was glad to see the end of hills, I still had enough left to go out and do another 10 miles. I had done what I set out to do.

We also had incredibly perfect weather today, and I know we have limited weeks to get this biking thing accomplished, so I still have some work to do, but am finally feeling more confident of making my goal.

THE BEST PRESCRIPTION

As I sit at work today, I overhear people talking about how totally stressed out they are: about the job, their kids, their life in general. All are taking some sort of antidepressant; none of them exercise.

I just went through 6 weeks of very stressful work days, in addition to my increasing training schedule. Yet, for the most part I was able to stay calm and focused, getting done what needed to be done the best I could, in as little time as I had. Of course I had to make adjustments to my schedule, like getting up earlier, just to get the workouts in without the distraction of work.

I realize some out there who do exercise still need drug therapy for whatever reason, and I'm not criticizing. I'm talking about these people I work with who look awful, feel awful, and miss a lot of work or spend many breaks also outside smoking to relieve their stress.

For me, this is where running or triathlon have saved me. I, too, have had many stressful moments in my life, but it has always been comforting to have the sports that I love to fall back on and get me through the hard times. No drugs involved.

AUGUST TOTALS

Probably one of my biggest training months (not the biggest) so far:

• Swim: 26,400 yards (15 miles) (longest swim 1.75 miles)
• Bike: 441.30 miles (longest bike 75 miles)
• Run: 63 miles (longest run 12 miles)

August also included one official triathlon and one indoor triathlon, so my training has been somewhat broken up by these and by some fatigue and some weather issues. But I think I am on track, and my race time Saturday was within the respectable time frame that I could do, so I do see measured progress.

September will prove to be challenging, but I'm looking forward to it, and it has to be done!

GIRL'S BEST FRIEND TRIATHLON

Saturday, August 29, 2009

This was the first time I have done an all women's race and I gotta say, I loved it! This was an innaugural event, with a sprint distance and an almost Olympic distance--the swim was only a 1k swim instead of a 1.5k--but close enough.

The morning started cool but muggy, like 62 degrees and 94% humidity muggy. By the time the sun came up though, it was feeling quite chilly as the humidity seemed to be blowing out from a northwest wind. The lake was calm however.

Jan and I headed down to the race yesterday afternoon and spent the night in a nearby motel. Just easier than doing that hour plus drive in the pitch dark and then not knowing where you're going anyway. We were racked right behind each other, based on race numbers.

It certainly is a different atmosphere with an all women's race. Lots of laughter, smiles, and giggles, and a definite camraderie I don't see at mixed races. We love the guys, but there is a different thing going on with just the gals.

Lots of first time triathletes were inspired to do this all women's race, maybe not worrying about feeling intimidated by fast guys. It was very exciting watching their excitement over doing their first event.

One thing I like about this racing company is the way they handle the swim when there is a sprint and longer course. The sprint course is on the inside of the longer course, so you never have to worry about crossing each other's paths.

It felt good getting in the water waiting for the start because it helped thaw my feet out. There were only about 85 women in the long course so we started all together. I got in the front line because everyone said they weren't "fast." I never believe anyone who says that because I am the only true not fast triathlete. My swim is okay though and I felt starting in the front would avoid the usual jam up when you get in the middle. But I didn't take into account the shallowness at first, so by the time I got into a comfortable depth, people were already passing. Still, I seemed to have a lot of space, no one was thrashing you, and there was no worry about younger guys coming up behind or over you later. I got off course slightly from the second to the third buoy, probably by the length of a pool, so had to work my way back over to get lined up right and kept on course the rest of the way. Just as we turned to head back to shore, the sun decided to pop out briefly, just enough to blind you, making it seem like you were looking into a fireball. I have learned to not look directly into the sun/sky for sighting when this happens and just look low and try to follow heads or arms ahead until I can see again.

I don't have the official swim time yet, but when I checked my watch at the first mat it was around 23 min. So pretty much what I figured. Then it was a hike up a huge hill to transition, which for once was right after the hill, and a short jog through to my bike. I knew I would beat Jan on the swim, so my next goal was to get to at least 5 miles on the bike before she went whizzing by.

I am always slow at swim to bike transitions. No matter how many races I do, I just don't get faster here. But I don't worry about it anymore, and today I was obviously not going to be the last one out there despite this.

I was warm enough that I decided against putting a shirt on over my tri top, even though it definiely was still chilly. I guess I hoped for a big warmup at some point, even though that only happened for about 10 minutes.

The bike course was mostly flat with all right turns. We did get the wind at 4 points once it picked up--from the north and from the west--and doing 2 loops for the 40k bike meant 4 times into the wind. But of course that also meant 4 times with it behind you, so it all evened out.

Doing 4+ hour bike rides for the past couple of months almost every week, doing 40k seems to go by so fast! And I was able to push myself harder, despite the wind. Because of this, Jan did not pass me until 10k, and we kept pretty close the rest of the way. She was always about 2 miles ahead of me, but with turnarounds, I kept her in my sight often. Not that I didn't expect her to beat me, because I knew she would. Just to give me an idea of how well I was doing.

Before I knew it, we were on our second loop. I had passed a woman in my AG (believe it or not and on a hill!) just before the second loop started, so now the burden was on me to keep ahead of her the rest of the time. So I did push myself harder than usual. As it turned out, I ended up beating her on the bike, but with a little confusion at the end--like where was the finish line?? she ended up almost behind me at the finish. And, as usual, she beat me out of transition to start the run, and I never saw her again in the race.

What I hate about this racing company is their usual BS of runs. You never know what you will get--longer course; dirt roads; rooted and rocky uphill trails; horse trails; and today to top it all off, mowed paths through open fields. Like a maize. Oh I hated this run! The first mile was the hardest, with the worst uphills with rocks and roots to watch out for, up and down dirt hills, through the park, mainly all cross country except a couple of short stretches on the paved roads. My legs really felt it on the grassy parts too. They just felt like stumps. So my first loop wasn't great, but again, after doing all the longer training runs a 5k went by pretty fast, despite the misearable course. I walked a lot more the first loop than I would have liked, so by the second loop I had to really focus to make my goal time. And it started raining at about mile 2, but thankfully it was just a shower. I didn't care about me getting wet. I just didn't want to get back to transition and have a bunch of soggy clothes and nothing warm to put on. And I couldn't remember either whethere it was a true 10k or some other manufactured distance they came up with to make it that much harder, so by mile 5 I started doubting my ability to make my 3:20 goal time. But as luck would have it, it was a true 10k, and I was extremely thankful to be done and my finishing time then was 3:18:52. Whew!

Jan did 3:02 and I was pretty sure she would finish under 3:05 (my predicted time for her) and she even took a wrong turn on one of the trails. I quickly packed up my bike and other gear and headed over to get something to eat waiting for awards. No sooner had awards started when another cloudburst started, along with high winds, which made it feel like someone spraying you with a hard misting hose.

Surprisingly, I ended up with 2nd place in the AG, even though I was pretty sure 3 other women were ahead of me. Maybe I didn't read their ages correctly because 1st place was the woman who I beat on the bike but who took off on the run before me.

We waited out the shower and then headed home. It was getting much colder and windier and I still had on wet clothes.

Now I'm sitting here thawing out with a hot cup of coffee. Its the end of August and it feels like October! I will predict though that the first week of school (week of Labor Day) summer will definitely be back!

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

LONG WORKOUTS AND STRATEGY

While I have been actively building my workout base all year, I now am in crunch time where I know I have to step it up some. I've been following a fairly relaxed schedule but was running into a roadblock when trying to figure out how to get more quality long bike workouts in on weekends, in addition to long run workouts. Sometimes that worked, sometimes not. Whenever I have a bad long bike workout, I always worry about making cutoff times in long events.

One thing I love about long swim workouts is that it helps me sort through those problem areas, tweaking the schedule here, tweaking the schedule there, but until today not coming up with any do-able plan. My half IM training program got to be way too tedious, with long swim workouts and run workouts on the same day. For some reason, I cannot stand doing long swim or run workouts after work. I don't mind doing bike workouts, but that may be more from the obvious reason that I can't do them in the morning on work days all that often due to darkness and time. By the time the training program was almost over, I was so sick of the pool I could hardly stand it.

Then I made a change that got me motivated again. So I have been doing swim workouts M, W, & F, run and bike workouts T & Th., long runs Sat., long bikes Sun. But still something has been lacking. Today in the pool I started really working on that dilemma, and I came up with a new plan that I hope works. I think it will help improve my biking and my bike to run transition as well.

My new plan will still be to swim M, W, & F, with long swims on Wednesday. Then my long run will be on Tuesday morning. That means I'll be getting to work late, but with all my extra hours that will not affect my total weekly hours at all. It will just mean planning ahead with people at work to let them know I will be in late on Tuesdays. Thursdays will continue with a morning run, finishing up with my hill workouts and eventually moving on to some speedwork, with a bike ride Thursday nights, again hills and speed. Saturday will be a mid distance bike ride with a run after, building on the distance there, and a long ride on Sunday. I know it sounds like I'm working out all the time, and in reality I do something every day, but I am used to getting up early anyway, and I prefer morning workouts so that I am not doing harder workouts back to back (night to morning), so even though I am doing something every day, two morning swims are easy workouts, and I don't consider them wearing me out.

I don't have much time to get this thing right, so here goes, hopefully off to a good start toward a great finish!

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

ANOTHER TOUGH TRAINING WEEK

I wish I could say the training has been going great, but at best its just okay. After my 75 mile ride last week, which I found out was very tough, Monday at work turned out to be a complete nightmare, with me working over 10 hours, and spending at least 8 of the 10 on my feet. By the end of the day, I was limping my feet hurt so much. Oh sure, I sat down to eat my lunch, while checking e-mails and voice messages, and entering week-end reports, if you really want to call that "resting." But, I did get in a one mile swim in the morning before work, and then did weights after work.

Tuesday, I got up early (4:45--that seems to work best) and headed to the gym again, but first did my hill repeats. Then on to another full day on the job, a near repeat of Monday. After work, I went to the park to get in a bike ride, but the fatigue caught up with me and since I was riding alone was not overly motivated. I got through about 13 miles but then called it a day.

Wednesday was another story. By now, the fatigue was hanging on, and I had an urgent project to get done before the rest of the office showed up. I did get to the gym, but there was absolutely no way I could do a 1.75 mile swim. I was pooped! And, typical of me, when I have an early morning deadline, I just have to go there and get it done before anything else. Naturally, I always say to myself I'll do the workout later, but it almost never happens, and that rang true that day. So I spent all day feeling guilty, but not enough to get into that pool after work, which as it turned out was after 6 pm with no breaks, due to another last minute crisis. After work, I decided to go shopping to get a new swim suit, and after that, I decided to just go home, make dinner, and then lie around and read. Only I only read about a page before I fell asleep.

Apparently, that was the magic charm, because even though I woke up still totally wiped out, after stretching and lying on the gym floor for about 10 minutes trying to will myself to move, I got up to go out and run. I really tried to rationalize doing it at lunch (yeah right) or after work (not likely!) so felt I had to get out there and at least make the effort. I ran in the downtown area, actually the hilly portion of downtown, getting in some good hill work and feeling quite good after. And pleased with myself that I didn't put it off again.

After work, Don met me for a nice almost 18 mile bike ride, where I did hills and speed work, which basically helped me keep up with him.

Then on to the Friday morning swim. I have been making this my easy day, by just swimming one mile, but I still felt guilty about missing my swim on Wednesday, and felt pretty good that morning actually, so went ahead and did 1.5 miles, about a minute faster than the last time, so I was pleased with that.

Friday ended up being another day with a last minute, late-in-the-day rush to get out. While I had enough extra hours for the week to take most of the day off, there was no chance of that happening, and ended up putting in another 9 hour day. It should be criminal to have to work after 5 pm on a Friday!

That evening I went to number 2 son's 22nd birthday party, and pretty much couldn't wait to get out of there to get home and collapse!

Saturday, the plan was to get up "early" to get out and run 11-13 miles before the heat became unbearable, but I was so tired I actually slept in--to 7:30! Then, by the time I dragged myself out the door it was almost 9. I headed to the park and just before arriving there got mixed up in a huge traffic jam due to construction. I finally bailed on that, only to get held up once again by the longest train in history! By the time I finally started running, it was almost 10 am, and the temps were probably 75+. I knew after a couple of miles with the heat that I had to choose a shady route, so went around the river and totally missed Don who had come down to bike and look for me. By the time I got done 2 hours later, I was ready to head to Lake Michigan.

The traffic in Grand Haven, a beach town that we love, was pretty slow and almost crawling, but eventually we got a parking spot and headed down towards the waters edge. We both were pretty tired after our workouts, but it was so hot that getting in the water was priority one! Again, another unbelievable Lake Michigan day, with the water temperature at 74 and the waves about a foot. Perfect for a swim! We only ended up doing about a half mile swim because we were tired enough from our earlier workouts and wanted to just relax. But the water was refreshing!

Sunday's plan was to bike 64-75 miles, depending on how I felt. I felt like crap once I got out there. It wasn't quite as hot as last weeek, but, after 25 miles, we went off the trail and rode another bike path into town, which added 10 miles that were definitely not quality miles--stop and go constantly and into a headwind. The result was that while the first 25 was well within my happy range of pacing, the 10 miles set me back considerably, so for the next 35 I felt like I had to make up for lost time. No matter how hard I pedaled, my body wasn't having any of it today. My feet hurt. I could not get out of the 13.7 mph range no matter how hard I tried. We had a head wind and a cross wind. My water was running out. You name it, it happened today. I was pretty much crazed by the time we got done and COULD NOT WAIT to get off that bike! By then, it was in the upper 80s-low 90s, and a stiff wind, and I was totally cooked.

So now I feel discouraged. Disappointed. Deflated. Please tell me this is normal! Please tell me things will get better! Please tell me this body will adapt! And please tell me I won't go crazy about these bke miles!