I feel so much better about workouts now that I have actually figured out what works for me. I often get the guilts because I'm not thinking Ironman all the time. Its not that I wouldn't like to do one, its just that I don't think I'm there yet. If I didn't have to work 40+ hours a week, didn't have to deal with all the things I do, maybe I could actually think about and get involved with that type of distance. First, I do not have the income to support just jumping into any race that suits my fancy. Second, I do not have the time or energy right now to even put myself in a dream of doing that sort of thing. You see, my life isn't just about me. Its about dealing with my kids and their lives, the grandchildren, my boyfriend, work, and taking care of my dad, his medical problems and appointments, and dealing with all the family problems that go along with that. I have to divide myself in at least 10 directions, including training. So I guess I equate that to only being able to give 10% to something all the time, or neglecting things a lot of the time. Which I do sometimes.

This weekend was a mixed bag of everything. An issue arose with my brother that affected my dad. My brother thinks my dad "owes" him for "allowing" him to build a house on his property. To get back at him it seems, he doesn't bother to pay the taxes for that piece of property until they are ready to seize the property for a tax sale. If he would deed the property over to my dad, this wouldn't be an issue. My dad would pay the taxes. But he refuses because as he thinks in his mind, my dad "owes" him and refused to "give" him $14,000 a year ago to get his own home out of foreclosure. My dad ended up giving him $7,000 with the idea this would pay for the parcel of land his house sits on. That wasn't good enough. Nor was the other $43,000 that my brother either weasled out of my dad or took outright. Its a continuing saga that I don't know what to do about. But it cost me a night's sleep Friday night.

I was surprised then that the 6 mile run went as well as it did on Saturday. I timed it so I could go to my massage right after and then deal with my brother. While it seems to have resolved itself temporarily, I know it will come back and bite me again next year and the next. I don't want to talk any more about this because it irritates me so much, and I need that energy for other things.

Sunday was a 1 mile swim and 15 mile bike (inside--still too cold for me to want to go outside; hopefully it will be one of the last snowy, sleety weekends). I was a little disappointed in my mile swim time (41:15), but often when I am going to swim a little longer than usual I do slow down without realizing it, I guess to pace myself. This is the first swim/bike brick since December, and it was a full mile swim instead of 800 yards, so it was a little slow getting started on the bike. But I basically did the same bike time as last week doing just the bike alone (1:02:25). I know I need to work on both, but I still have some time. I figure with my inside bike and 2 spin classes last week, the total time was 1 hour 92 min., about 39 miles. (More than Don who is doing IM Coeur D'Alene in 3 months! But his run is much better than mine, so I guess he figures he will get the bike down as soon as the weather turns. )

This weekend I will be in Chicago with the grandchildren, so probably won't get much time to work out, so that leaves a Friday night run hopefully. That also means pacing myself out this week so I am not doing back to back hard workouts.

I also have had the progress of losing 6 pounds, about 2 pounds per week. What I have done mainly is eliminate LOTS of unneeded calories per day that were not getting burned off. If I were to continue at this rate, I could conceivably lose all the excess pounds from the past 3 years by the time of my triathlon in mid-June. It is wishful thinking, but also very possible to happen, just by doing what I have been doing (or not doing) for the past 3 weeks. Stay tuned for that progress.